Take Care of Your Planet

Two Marses oppose Paris exit —

In a rare display of solidarity, both Marses, the planet and the candy company, expressed their dismay at the US exit from the Paris Agreement.

CEO of Mars, Inc. Grant Reid said, “Mars stands by the Paris Climate Agreement. We remain committed to work with all governments and our supply chain partners around the world to achieve the carbon reduction targets the planet needs.”

Valentine Michael Smith* the most famous citizen of Mars, had this to say:

“People of Earth, you need to grok the danger your planet faces. Continuing as you are will lead to the discorporation of all humans.”

“Why do the people of Mars care?” we asked.

“Because if you destroy your planet, you will want ours. You are already planning to visit us. Mars is a nice planet to visit, but we don’t want you to live there. We like our climate the way it is.”

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*For more about Mr. Smith see Robert A. Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land.

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8 thoughts on “Take Care of Your Planet

  1. C l o w n s t i t u t I o n a l C a t a c l y s m

    In the film, The Queen of Hearts, the Germans, in the face of an Allied advance in WWI, must retreat from a French town that they’ve first booby-trapped. Knowing this, every last resident evacuates the town.

    The doors to the local insane asylum are left open, however, and all the patients wander out and enter the small town. They are a very imaginative group of madmen, apparently, and assume the identities of the evacuees, occupying shops and imitating doing business, teaching classes to young adults, manning the police posts, delivering mail, and so on. Of course, no cash trades hands, teachers make up their gibberish syllabi, cops are unarmed and merely emblematic presences, and the mail that’s being delivered consists of old or empty envelopes.

    It was necessary for the lunatic mayor to appoint the most colorful and inept of all the lunatic escapees to important government posts. It was necessary by law for the town to crumble into madness. Additionally, the town budget had disappeared, so the limosine to the mayoral inauguration was a clown car. Each polka-dotted Secretary of Whatever emerged wearing size 72 shoes. An innocent bystander was killed by a seltzer bottle explosion. The mayor had no clothes.

    Nobody noticed.

    Liked by 1 person

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